Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
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