You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Randomize
