Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
is it fun? or sober?
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Randomize
