all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
And then he peed in my hair
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