Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Randomize
