shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
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