I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
