I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
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