Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
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