I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize