I'm gonna have a badass scar
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Randomize
