U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Randomize
