Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
