Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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