I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
