I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
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