the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Randomize
