So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize
