After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
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