Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
If I die, sorry about rent.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
Randomize
