I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Randomize