so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Randomize
