I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
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