just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
