apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
