Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Randomize