this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
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