6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
God I need to hump something, right now.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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