Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
