literally had 100 drinks last night.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Randomize
