Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
