Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Randomize
