I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
