I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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