So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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