google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize