3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
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