Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
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