I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
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