i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
