oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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