Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize
