Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Randomize