Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
Randomize
