we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
