that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Help. Why am I so naked?
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
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