Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Randomize
