I wish i was in the wii world.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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