Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
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