Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
