We got so high we made milksteak
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
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