I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
